Monday, October 3, 2011

New Story: The Adjusters #21

Two days late, but here is October's episode of The Adjusters, "Happy Birthday", wherein we discover the limits of the author's storytelling abilities—huh, I mean, wherein a birthday celebration turns out to be way more emotional than anyone might have anticipated.

As usual, comments welcome.

I'll also remind you that we have a Speculation Thread available for discussion. (A thread which I read but do not comment on.)


21 - Happy Birthday

The singing was awful, off-key, earbleed inducing--the way it often
was. Jackson yelling to the top of his lungs was simply par for the
course. Still, Daniel thought it was sweet. Grossly embarrassing, but
sweet. The waitresses carried a small cake, joining in the
revelry. Patrons around the restaurant were split between those who
laughed earnestly, those who ignored studiously, and those who scorned
openly. Next to him, Cindy was singing softly, her voice clearest
among the friends at the table, her "Happy Birthday to You!" sounding
like raindrops in a lake. Daniel wondered if she had ever sung on
stage, and tabled the question for later.

He looked around the booth as the waitresses left. Cindy was sitting
next to him, looking lovely as usually. Jackson and Kyra were sitting
opposite, their hands clasped together underneath the table. Remnants
of their dinner were strewn before them, and wine was still flowing
freely. They were on their third bottle. And now they had a small cake
to share. A tablet computer was leaning against the wall of the booth,
running a video conference application through which the smiling face
of Radhu could be seen. Radhu had loaned out the tablet to
Daniel--part of a remote learning project he was doing with a doctoral
student in the Department of Education--so that he could participate
in the festivities without leaving his apartment, something he had not
done in more than four months now.

Daniel felt a dissociation come over him; for a second, he was outside
the bubble, listening in, watching everyone at the table quibble over
which slice of the cake they cared about. He flashed to a similar
scene a year earlier, another dinner for his birthday, this time at
Serena's place--Jenn, Radhu, Serena, and him, the three musketeers. In
less than a year, everything had changed. Jenn--don't think about it,
he chided, she's gone. Radhu was still around, and had not really
changed aside from his physical withdrawal from the outside world. And
Serena...


Continue reading...


Next month, episode 22: "Back in Town".

3 comments:

  1. was waiting for that scene at the end- you teased it a while back. I almost thought that Dan was getting over Jenn leaving and just concentrating on the why she left. But now I'm not sure. Wonder if Jenn will make a strip appearance.

    Interesting way that Cindy was trying to overcome her block- she still might with Daniel. He now knows what she wants. She almost told him about the frat too, but she is as Daniel stated "selfish". She wants him for her.

    On my wish list for this episode 21: wished raven haired woman, the company, or the doctor made an appearance.

    Plot wise: 1) Jenn is still devoted to Biff. 2) Cindy is pushing Daniel 3) Daniel is wondering about Serena- maybe she'll help break this frat thing for him 4) wonder what else Rhad had- maybe a video/email from Biff/Jenn or some sort of important communication from the frat

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  2. forgot some thoughts:
    1) i would replace "mate" with Daniel. that goes more with Rhad's personality.
    2) The last scene: this will push or pull daniel more towards cindy. he wants to figure what happened to jenn but he seems resigned that Biff and Jenn are together and cindy is availaible.
    3) If he does figure it out- what would he do, would he go back to jenn b/c he knows it was caused my MC. Would Jenn want to be back with him knowing what she was through.
    4) Will Cindy end up telling him what the frat is doing- she almost did. What would he then think? Who would she be loyal to- her new b/f or herself?

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